I would love to think that this blog is going to get a ton of attention or that I will follow through on updating this, but to be honest I'm not sure either is going to happen.
I'm doing this as a kind of therapy, to help me reflect on the life that I have been living and where I would like to be in the somewhat near future.
What spawned this blogging? Well to be honest I hit an all time low, in a matter of three weeks I found out two of my near and dear family members were undergoing surgery, one for gastric band and the other for a brain aneurysm, my beloved and sweet Grandmother was in the hospital with a cancer that no one knew she had and because of this she wasn't going to leave the hospital, and lastly my fiance broke off our engagement.
Now don't get me wrong, I know in comparison to other individuals lives, this isn't bad, but for me this was a pretty hard hit, I know my life isn't hard, as a matter of fact, I'm very thankful for everyone that is in my life, my friends and family have been tremendous, and even the ex has been kind and cordial. I honestly couldn't ask for better people to go through this with, but still, it doesn't make the heartache hurt any less.
So here I am, day three of the break-up, still no appetite, but I'm starting to feel that this situation has spawned a new self-awareness, a new sense of responsibility and accountability, I feel like I've matured, is this temporary? Well thats quite possible, but I guess you'll have to continue reading to find out...
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I'm going through the same too, with the engagement and boy thing. He asked my father, got me to come back to Fargo from Minneapolis, just to back out. Now, Im crashing at the parents and working and trying to figure it all out again. Also, I lost my job. I worked my ass off, extremely successful and The Museum decided to cut the program that I built. It was not in my control. I'm almost 30 and I thought I would have something together by now. But, keep in mind, The best is yet to come. That keeps me from not falling apart.Also, my bestest friend told me, if God didn't want it to happen, he's not going to let it happen. Lastly, laugh. Laugh, laugh and laugh.
ReplyDeleteI hear Your Mom is bringing good ol' grandma out this way at the end of October. If you're not in school, it might be a good oppotunity to get away from it, for a little bit.
Keep your chin up and I'm sorry. I know all too well what you're going through.
Bekah
Very well written. You've always had a way with words. I love you and I know this will just make you stronger. Know that I'm always here for you!
ReplyDeleteAudra, my dear, I am so sorry about all that is going on in your life right now. I appreciate your maturity in knowing that this is your life and though others are worse, you are accepting of that but at the same time, you are going through a bit of your own.
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing person with a greatful and gracious essance about you. I am sorry to hear about your engagement. I have had many friends go through this, and no matter what any one can say, no one can heal your wounds but yourself.
I believe blogging is a very soul defining thing, and have started many on my own. I quit blogging after leaving myspace but do wish to some day get back to it.
I hope you know I am only a few hours away and our house is always open to you.
Please take care of yourself. If you ever need to chat let me know :)
xoxoxo
cousin amanda